Thursday, September 24, 2009

An Extra Pissy Thursday Rant

The other day, I noticed a bunch of kids throwing acorns into the trees overhanging the playground at my kids' school. When I got closer, I realized that they were throwing acorns at a HUGE hornet's nest. In my most parental, authoritative voice, I told them to cut the crap, that it is just stupid to throw acorns at a hive, especially when you don't know if the hive is active or not, and if they learned nothing else in their public education, it should be that pissing off a swarm of bees is idiotic. I said this in a nice way, of course. Then I went into the office to report both the hive and the acorn throwing. The town had been notified about the hive, and it was an active one; hornets had been seen milling about. And a teacher went out to stop the silly little bastards from getting stung a billion times.

The very next day, when going to pick Medium up early for a doctor's appointment, I saw a town truck idling in the school driveway next to the playground, and a grown man, cigarette hanging from his mouth, THROWING ACORNS AT THE HORNET'S NEST.  A town employee, someone paid by my taxes, was doing what I had just told a group of children NOT to do because it was STUPID. I stood there trying to find a single GOOD reason he might be doing this, and could come up with nothing. Lots of bad reasons, but not a single good one. The hive had been reported as being live, so he shouldn't have been testing that, especially by throwing stuff at the hive. He shouldn't have been trying to knock it down, because not only is that the dumbest thing ever (again, angry swarm of hornets) ,but to try to do it with acorns is embarrassing and pathetic. I am also assuming he was specifically sent to the playground and did not show up on his shift to play on the tire swing, noticed the hive and thought that throwing acorns at it would be fun. 

In my world, it should have gone like this: 
1. Town gets call of active nest at school playground.
2. Town dispatches team of EXPERIENCED hornet's nest removers AFTER school hours to remove it, with cherry picker, protective clothing, and whatever other equipment is needed.
3. Town removes hive.
4. Everyone is happy, kids are safe, and no one is in the hospital recovering from their billion stings, jonesing for a cigarette. 

Since the kids are home sick AGAIN, I don't know what the status of the hive is, but it had better be gone. We have sacrificed a lot to live in this town where the taxes are astronomical, and I honestly don't think it is too much to expect that the town quickly, safely and efficiently remove an obvious danger and potential lawsuit from the playground.  But bureaucracy being what it is, throwing acorns at the nest MAY BE the most efficient way to get things done.

God, I need another soda.


  1. Was the man being paid to remove it?

    Doesn't matter, the man was still an idiot. I hope it's been removed. My Grandma knew 2 kids that were stung to death, they were both stung a hundred times or hundreds or times, I don't remember.

  2. He was indeed being paid, Tricia, though to my knowledge, the town did not instruct him to fling acorns and infuriate the bees. He may have come up with that little bit of stupid all on his own. But again, I don't know that for sure, it could be bureaucratic stupidity at work.

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  3. That is so idiotic it's kind of funny. (I know it's not really, but OMG!) I mean a grown man throwing acorns at a beehive!!?? Definitely not something the guys would do, although we had one at the house and did try to knock it down with a football. Guys will do stupid things for no reason sometimes.
    But you're right. Your town should have it more together for the safety of the kids.
    Hope your kids feel better soon. Have a good weekend.